Sunday, August 25, 2013

"Hey sir, can you give me a piggyback ride?"

Don't question the title.

This is a normal sentence.


Alright. One boredom post documenting my week, coming up.

Ugh. My brother is bothering me. As he has been all. week.
I've been babysitting.
I almost died.
My 8 year old brother.....he's a gem.

So....what have I been doing this week?

Then on Wednesday, I went to this thing called Frontline, at our church. Pretty much a game night. We played Human Foosball (conclusion: I am even worse at sports than I thought.), and Capture the Flag. The latter happens to be one of my favorite games. I was put in charge of guarding the jail, along with another guy who had been guarding before me. Apparently, before I got there, he got really bored. And this happened:

*boy enters jail*
Boy: Someone, help!
Guard: No one's going to bail you out, kid. (a bunch of sixth graders were there, and this kid was one)
Boy: What about...Mr. Washington?
Guard: Huh?
Boy: *pulls out a dollar bill*
Guard: You deserve to be free.

He didn't even take the money. That kid deserved it. But not much was happening, so we....kinda got bored. A bunch of people were in the jail, and so we said if they entertained us they could get out. They got desperate. We had people singing (the bad singers we kept in even longer xD), dancing, telling jokes, balancing spoons on their noses, etc etc. One guy bribed us with 5 dollars. And because we're us.....

We took the money and split it. What do you expect?

On Friday, we went on a picture scavenger hunt. We had wayyyyy too much fun. We had to go all around town and take a picture with stuff. For example:

Asking a stranger for a piggyback ride. (We did this one at Chick-Fil-A, and I had to bribe "E" with an ice cream cone if she did it. Haha.)

Re enact a Disney scene in public.

Ask a random stranger to hold up a sign that says Raphael. (This guy was alone, Irish dancing in a park. We had to interrupt him and ask him to do it xD)

Juggle in public, and have strangers applaud.

Duck walk across a street. (This team apparently got honked at. haha.)

Take a picture on a firetruck. (We were the last team to get there, and the firefighters obviously knew why we were there. Haha.)

We had to do the YMCA in front of the YMCA. (This is the only picture I'm in, hence the filter so you can't really zoom in and see my face clearly enough. Haha.) 

And the guy's attempt at getting bonus points by taking random pictures. I don't quite know what's going on here.

We also had to have a specific prop in every picture. Our team had to have a world map, the guys had to have a giant orange cone, and the youngest team, mostly comprised of 6th graders, had to have a broken electric guitar. Let me tell you, you get really weird looks when you're walking through Walgreens, looking for a stranger to hug, carrying this 3x4 feet world map.

We had so much fun! Although I was kind of worried we might get yelled at by some people. Like when we had to touch the roof of this random yellow car. (it's an inside joke at my church) Thank goodness they didn't have a car alarm. We parked, ran out, took the picture, and ran back into the car and drove away in the space of 60 seconds. Or when the people at Chick-Fil-A were looking at us weird when we started taking pictures with a tiny decorative cow there. Or when we started juggling in the middle of Burger King.

I'd say we had fun.

And we won! :D

That's all for now. Oh! My brothers are starting school tomorrow....MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Also, I'm thinking of doing this magical thing called....VLOGGING. If I get my parents approval to do it, I'd probably vlog 2 or 3 times a week. About what? I have no idea. But I liked vlogging on my Kentucky trip, and I want to do it more. And actually be able to put it up on Youtube! (Make it unlisted, though. :/ ) Would you guys watch it if I decided to do it?

Okay, that's really all for now.

~ Audrey

Friday, August 16, 2013

it's audrey, not aubrey, aubdrey, or audbrey

Hey guys!
Guess where I am?

If you guessed Manchester, Kentucky, you're right! 
If you also guessed in the car back home, you are also correct. I seem to write the most in the car.
Of course, I'm usually with my brothers, not with a girl hyped up on 6 donuts, three people trying to sleep, another girl punching the roof of the van, two people singing at the top of their lungs, and then a youth pastor just encouraging it all.

If you're reading this, GET ME OUT OF HERE.

Just kidding. That was the ride there. The ride back?

I don't want to speak of it. "E", who, even though he has excellent taste in music ( Dubstep, alternative rock, and Two Door Cinema Club for the win!) is currently attempting to dougie as "F" licks people's elbows and "W" and "C" sing Taylor Swift.

Help me.


So have you guys ever heard the song "What's up?" Well, our youth pastor has. Many times, seeing as he sang the chorus at the top of his lungs every. Single. Day. He also changed the words around to fit the situation. For example:


Or this one, sung by another girl about our leader on the trip:


Yeah. That's not even all that's been going on this trip. There's a game we play called "What are the odds?" Basically, you give someone a dare, (for example, one that I had to do was take 5 pictures with my friend "W". It was horrific.) and then you ask them what the odds are that they would do that dare. They could go as low as 1 in 5, and as high as 1 in 1,000. Then, they count to three, and yell out at the same time a number between the odds they picked. Like if they picked 1 in 5, they had to yell out a number between 1 and 5. If it's the same number, they have to do it.

Some that we had to do was have our youth pastor take a creepy picture of te youth leader, blow it up to poster size, have him autograph it, then put it on our currently vacationing pastor's bathroom door.

Quite a welcome home present.

Or, nine weeks ago, when our youth leader was forced to start wearing an ugly goodwill vest at the worksite everyday.

And when I won against "A", a guy my age in the group, I made him sing One Direction in front of the kids at VBS. it was only two lines, but it was priceless.

And when "F" made me draw a shaving cream mustache and leave it on while cleaning up. She also made me put shaving cream on my tongue for 30 seconds. =P yuck. 

Anyway, I bet you're wondering what happened on the trip besides all of this craziness. You think that was crazy? Not even close. 

<insert a vlog that i took of "J" singing a made-up KFC song, along with some other craziness that I can't post because I am in it, and ugh, my face....>


What were we doing in Kentucky? 
We were staying at God's closet.

Basically, since Manchester is very poor, people who need clothes can come by and pick up a certain number of items.  It's really nice. 

Since I doubt any of you amazing readers know anything about Manchester, I will recount to the best of my ability what the youth leader told us. If I have any facts wrong, I apologize. =P

5 years ago, Machester was one of, if not the biggest, drug abused cities in the USA.  Almost everyone was on drugs, including the mayor, the chief of police, etc etc. So of course, they did nothing about it, even encouraging it. 

Those people? They're in jail now. Because the churches of Manchester said, "Hey. This isn't right." They wrote petitions, campaigned, signs, approaching non-drug addict officials, and they finally got their way. 

Even after all of this, however, 50% of people in Machester are still on some kind of drug. When we went around to houses asking if any of the kids wanted to come to VBS, every house and apartment had the lingering scent of cigarette smoke, mostly because if you just began to withdraw from drugs, it was be easier to slowly stop by taking cigarettes instead of crack or cocaine. A little girl who couldn't have been older than 5 came to our VBS, and when she gave me a hug, she smelled so much like smoke that I had to try not to cough. It's really sad.

But Manchester is also called the city of hope. It went from the entire government being corrupted and everyone on drugs  to youth all around America driving in to help teach kids about God, build and repair houses, give away clothes, etc. and while it still has lots of problems, it is so much better than it once was.

So what did we do there?

Let me give you a run-down through our daily schedule. 

6:15 : If you're on breakfast duty, this is when you start cooking. We were all divided into teams of three for breakfast and dinner prep and cleaning crew. 

7:15 : Eat! We didn't just have cereal and things like that, but also homemade muffins, French toast, cinnamon rolls, and even more good stuff =)

8:15: Devotions. This week we've been learning about Elisha. I must have 5 devotion books at home, but I never really used them. But now I am. It was an interesting experience for me, seeing as I've never really done them and now have to do them every day for 45 minutes. But it was thoroughly enjoyable. 

9:00: Leave for the work site. This summer, we were helping repair a man named Spencer's house. Teams of teens had been working on the extremely damaged house all summer, but we were the last team. That meant we got to see the house finished! This week, we put up siding. A LOT of siding. And I had to climb on a ladder. A very, very, very high ladder, where I then had to let go and trust the the spotters below will hold me as I lean way over and try to nail in some siding. I actually like heights. Give me a trip to the Empire State Building and I'll stand on the roof any day. But whenever I am the one deciding whether or not I fall? Such as ladders, rope courses, etc? No. Nonononononononono. This is how a lot of the ladder climbing seemed to me:

Person: hey Audrey, can you go hammer  in that nail?
Me: *looks up* ...All the way up there? Butbutbutbutbut.... *realizes I haven't done anything yet* fine....
Person: I'll spot you.
*le me climbs on ladder*
*le me looks down*
Me: woah.....uh guys are so tiny down there....and I'm so high up....and this ladder isn't sturdy, and....OKAY OKAY LET ME DOWN BEFORE I FALL AND DIE
person: *rolls eyes* Audrey, you're only on the first step. 

Okay, that might be a bit of exaggeration, but that's what it felt like.

The first two days it was raining, so we had to set up tarps. However, the ground was still muddy and gross. So, of course, someone was due to jump off the last rung of the ladder, and then slip down a hill covered in mud. "Mudslide", I'm looking at you. To be honest, I was SO surprised I didn't fall and die. I am such a klutz.

We also painted a little, our youth pastor installed a tiny little mailbox thing (you have no idea how proud he was of that =P) , did window trim, and just made the place look even better. We also took pick axes and broke up the dirt so we could spread seed. "E", who plays Minecraft,
said now he understood how Steve felt. =P

We were the last team, so we got to see the house dedicated just yesterday. It was so awesome! The house looked great. 

12:00: lunch, where we usually played what are the odds. I got "E" to eat a cookie using a dirty fork that he found stuck in the ground as he was breaking up the dirt. He also found a shirt, thermometer, doll head, coat hanger...

12:50 : Back to work!

3:45 : Leave the worksite, where we drove to the small park where we ran the VBS and started setting up. Then, "A"  and I would go with our youth leader to our van, where we would drive up to the apartments and picked kids up. Let me tell you, the 6 minute drive with kids who "want to jump out the window and flip the car over because it would be so awesome! I've done it before. Just let me do it!" is...interesting.

4:00 : We officially start VBS. We told a bible story, did a craft and a missionary story, and of course, had snacks and played games. I'm pretty sure half the kids only came because on the third day we got to throw a pie in someone face ( the kid who won the right got to throw it in the youth leader's face. He has a red beard, so she was determined to get whipped cream in it) and because we had chocolate chip cookies.

6:00 : Drop the kids off, then go back to
God's closet and start dinner. 

7:15 : Dinner! We had things like tacos, spaghetti, chicken, fajitas, etc etc. 

8:15 : Team time, where we would discuss how today went, how we could improve, and encouraged each other using beads. A red one for leadership, a green one for compassion, a white one for service, and a blue one for risk taking.  Every night, we could give one bead to someone. I got a blue bead for risk taking  (aka, climbing  on that death ladder) from a chaperon and a white bead for service from my youth pastor. Each bead is accompanied with why you were giving that particular bead to that particular person, and the words my youth pastor said I will remember for a long time. =)

10:30ish :Lights out!

However, yesterday was different.

We went to a national park for devos, and to explore. Since the house was done and VBS was over, we drove an hour and a half to Gray's arch, a gorgeous rock formation. Half the time I couldn't even concentrate on devos, the view was so beautiful! 

Then we went to a pizza place called Miguel's, which also doubles as a campsite. 

Still not sure if that's a man with long hair or a woman with a mustache.

Afterwards, we returned home to God's Closet, where we packed, had an encouragement circle (where we went around the circle and one teen and one adult said something encouraging about each of us.) and slept for about five hours on a "bed". (Only about two of us had mattresses, the rest had a box spring.)

And that brings me to where I am now. Driving into the entrance to *cough* as we blast Vampire Weekend's "A Punk" from the speakers and dance and sing along.

Life is good.

And then, of course, I get a text from my mom saying my father has written a welcome home song and plans to sing it to me in the parking lot. 

Way to ruin the moment.

Okay, I'm out! Bye guys!
~Audrey (NEVER AUBREY. OR AUDABREY. OR AUBDREY. The first day, everyone called me Aubrey, now they just do it to annoy me. N and Will, when you call me it, I will kill you. Way to end this on a murderous note. )

Friday, August 9, 2013

a completely boring post that you don't need to bother reading

My broskie Abdul has a blog! You guys should totally check it out!
I needed a post before I leave for Kentucky.
How about this random questionnaire?

1. Name: Audrey Ray *coughs*
2. Nickname: Aud, Drey, Audria (xD), Audareya, AudPod, GoldRey, CFL, Canadian Football League, Ceilingfanlover, Stephanie (don't ask), a nickname I will not put on here even though many people on the ToO call me it, because then everyone will call me it =P, Audge (Call me this and die.) Audge-Podge (Call me this and I will kill you, then bring you back to life and kill you again. Well aren't I murderous today?)
3. Elementary school : W***** Christian Academy, Deer**** Elementary, Christian School of K****** ( the asterisks would reveal the true name, and you could google it and see pictures of little me on their websites. Haha.)
4. Sweats or jeans? Jeans
5. Oranges or apples? Oranges! (And the TCF battle continues....)
6. Do you have a crush on someone? Who wants to know?
7. Eat or drink? @_@ food.....
8. Piercings? Just my ears. And my tongue, but no one's supposed to know about that....
9. Coke or Pepsi? Root Beer
Have you ever:
10. Been in an airplane? Just got off of one Sunday!
11. Been in a car accident? When I was little, if that counts. 
12. Been in a fist fight? Oh, I've beat my brothers up a number of times *grins*
First and last:
13. First piercing: Ears.
14. First best friend? Sundae
15. First award? Superior Honor Roll
16. First crush?....I don't remember.
17. First word? Octopus. (JK, Dada. I think.)
18. Last person you talked to in person? My broskies.
19. Last person you texted? Wendy.
20. Last person you messaged? N. 
21. Last person you watched a movie with? Um....I think I watched Scooby Doo with my brothers yesterday. DON'T JUDGE ME. 
22. Last food you ate? An ice cream cone.
23. Last movie you watched in theaters? Despicable Me 2
24. Last song you listened to? Erm....All the Way by Capital Kings (Matthew Parker remix. Seriously, how did I live 14 years without knowing about Matthew Parker?)
25. Last person you hugged? My cousin 
26. Food? Anything unhealthy =P
27.drink? Cherry Coke Zero.
28. Flower? ...I have no idea.
29. Animal?, llameesecorn ( combination of llama, moose, and unicorn.) I also like platypi xD
30. Color? Turquoise 
31. Place? Matagorda, or the mysterious town where I grew up =P
32. Movie? So many....I'll just say the Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe, or the dawn Treader.
33. Subject? Communications. We watch YouTube for our assignments. :D
Have you ever....
34. Fallen in love with someone? I don't think so. But then again, I'm 14 4/5. 
35. Celebrated Halloween? Yep! 
36. Went over the minutes/texts on your phone. ALL THE TIME.
37. Wanted to smack someone upside the head? ALL THE TIME.
38. Eaten a whole pizza? Nope. I might, if my parents don't stop me. =P
39. Did something you regret? Hasn't everyone?
40. Broke a promise? Sadly.
41. Hid a secret? All the time. 
42. Pretend to be happy? More than most know. 
Your future?
43. Want kids? 3, not FIFTY. -_- *glares at Sammy*
44. Get married? Aren't I already? xD (as everyone gives me weird looks....don't ask.)
45. Career? Yeah. No idea what it might be, though.
Which is better in the opposite gender? ( well, this is an odd topic...)
46. Lips or eyes? Eyes.
47. Shorter or taller? Taller.
48. Romantic or spontaneous? Spontaneous.
49. Hook up or relationship? Relationship.
50. Looks or personality? Personality.
Have you ever....
51. Lost glasses/contacts? Nope.
52. Snuck out? Um...maybe.....a couple times....okay, like 10 times. No bigee. (What, mom? I was totally kidding....)
53. Held something and dropped it? I'm a klutz. Duh. 
54. Broke someone's heart. Hopefully not! 
55. Been in love. I'm fourteen, people....
Do you believe in....
56. Yourself? Sometimes.
57. Miracles? Yes.
58. Love at first sight? Yes.
59. Santa? *whispers* no...*hides from believers*
60. Forever and always? Um...yes?
61. Is there one person you want to be with right now? Yep. 
62. Who your real friends are? As in, I know who my real friends are? Yeah. 
63. Who was the last person you texted? Wasn't I asked this already? Last person I messaged now is N. 
64. Who's your best friend? Hmm. I have a few, and they're all my best friends for different reasons.
65. Guy you trust the most? My parents are probably going to read this, so I have to pretend boys are icky and I never talk to any of them. =P

Yeah. So, I'm going to be gone for a week, and needed a post. I apologize if I bored you. =P

So, pray for me on this missions trip where I will be stuck in a car for 15 hours and am not allowed to listen to anything!

Sunday, August 4, 2013

Pura Vida, Costa Rica, and other words I don't know the definition of

Seriously, what does Costa Rica even mean? By the coast? And the entire time we were there, people kept yelling Pura Vida at the most random times. It has me very confused.
But anyway...

Long time no see! I bet you've all been wondering... Where in the world is Carmen, Sandiego Audrey? Texas. But in an seriousness, on restriction, and then on vacation, obviously. But to make up for my 21 day absence, I have the chronicles of my vacation to Quepos, Costa Rica :D (And yes, ACTS, and all. I know. It gets even better.) Beware. I'm a terrible poet. You'll see why. Oh, and I don't really have any photos, because my dad took all the electronics I had away for the vacation.

Pack up my 30 pound suitcase (I didn't even know I had this much stuff!) and head off to the airport, where we took a 3 hour flight to San Jose. From there, we take....a death plane.

I should probably explain this a bit. The only way to Quepos from San Jose is to either drive 4 hours on perilous mountain roads, or take a very, very small plane and fly there, which takes about 20 minutes. I have always told myself that I will never ever get on one of those tiny planes. But guess what? I did. And God was looking out for me, seeing as we flew in the middle of a LIGHTNING STORM. IN A CLOUD. WITH NO VISIBILITY WHATSOEVER. I was right behind the pilot, and let me tell you, when you're already scared of going on a tiny plane, hearing the guy flying that plane say "Uh oh" and "Oops, sorry" is NOT GOOD. In fact, as we were in the middle of a cloud, the plane STALLED. Only for like a second, but still, my heart dropped.

Anyway, against all odds, I made it through alive. But it was close.

We finally made it to the hotel, and it was SO AWESOME. The resort had pretty steep walkways, so if you needed to get somewhere, you could call for a golf cart to drive you there. Let's just say I had a bit too much fun.

Me: Jeeves, call a car. I wish to dine at the resturant this evening. And do ask for the car with the white seats? It goes with my outfit.
Brother: My name is Abdul, and call the golf cart yourself.
Me: *glares* I can dream, okay?


Ziplining! In the Costa Rican rainforest!

150 feet up. And landing on platforms with no railings, 8 by 8 feet, 200 feet up, with 12 people on it. I was terrified. But it was so. much. fun. Except for the Tarzan swing. No, I'm not making that up. You swing on a rope, 200 feet in the air, over to the next platform. I can't even tell you how scared I was. But my brother? Instead of landing on the platform like everyone else, he swung back and forth, then landed. It was fun after I was on the ground.
But seriously, if you ever have the chance to go ziplining, I highly recommend it.

That night, however, was not good. Why? Two words: bug bites.
I didn't see a single mosquito bite in the flipping rainforest, but at dinner? As I was attempting to not itch, I wrote a haiku. Because I'm totally a poet.

Mosquito Bites: A Haiku
Mosquitoes sure suck.
I have bug bites everywhere.
Why must I taste so darn sweet?

That's not even the worst poem in this post. Believe me. I think the only poem I've ever written that I didn't immediately hate was my homework limerick. My teacher kinda got mad. (In case you want to read it, here it is.
Homework is stupid and terrible
For teens it is completely unbearable
It should be abolished
And all homework demolished
The damage it does is irreparable.

This is what happens when my teacher tells me to write a poem about homework. Anyway...)

Beach day! It is so pretty there; it's even better than the picture.  And it was completely empty. There's two beached near us; one was a public, crowded beach, and then there was a small, secluded, hotel owned beach. We went to the latter, obviously. But the waves are CRAZY. Omygosh, we got knocked down just by the force of them at least 20 times. My poor mother was worried sick; she couldn't take her eyes off of us. And there was so much sand. I wrote a poem about it as I attempted to scrub the sand out of my hair.

Sand: Another terrible poem by me
Sand, sand, everywhere
Sand, sand, in my hair
Sand, sand, it's all over
Sand, sand, on my shoulder
Sand, sand, I hate it
Sand, sand, I'm a horrible poet

I told you.

(Spare me the ACTS teasing, will you?)
White water rafting! 
I was soaked. That might be because of the waves, or because I decided to go swimming in the river. Totally meant to. Yeah. No, I really did. It was getting back into the boat that was less than graceful. I'd call the rafting the best part of the vacation. It was from about 8 to 4, so we were gone most of the day. But my transportation curse continued.

What, you say?

Well, the bus that we were taking was 2 minutes away from our hotel when it ran out of gas. ON A HILL. Luckily, it didn't completely roll backwards or anything, but we did have to wait a bit for a new bus to arrive. We also had to listen to angry Costa Rican's attempt to go around us on a crowded hill. But hey, we survived. ;)

In the morning, we walked along the beach over to a tiny little town mostly filled with tourist shops. We got bombarded a few times walking; people kept trying to sell us anything from pots to parasailing tours. (Which I really wanted to do, but sadly, you have to either A. be over 18, or B. Go with someone who is over 18. My dad hates heights, and my mom would never do that. So unfortunately, I guess I'll have to wait a couple years. =P ) We did get a few things at the shops, though. After that, we went over to the beach again, and then took a free tortilla making class. Conclusion: I will never be a chef. But my family seemed to enjoy it.

In the morning, we went swimming again. On the far side of the beach, there was a bunch of rocks that were crawling with hundreds of hermit crabs. So what were us kids to do? Make a hermit crab racetrack, of course! We got around 20 hermit crabs, spent half an hour on a structure that could resemble a hermit crab track if you looked the right way, and watched the hermit crabs immediately try to escape. After we made the walls higher, we actually managed to race them. We got a few stares as we cheered our favorites on, but it was fun. That is, until the tide came in and the racetrack were brutally demolished, while the hermit crabs were swept out to sea. It was fun while it lasted.

Later that day we went on a Hanging Bridge tour. See the photo to your left. They're pretty much bridges all throughout the rain forest that are hundreds of feet in the air. It was gorgeous! And at the end, you can go swimming in a small river. I wasn't planning to go in, but you guys know how graceful I am. Of course I slipped on the rocks and fell in. *bows* Thank you, thank you. I know.

Even later, we went on a night hike at a nature reserve. Night time happens to be when all the creepy crawlies come out. And I am NOT a fan of bugs. I give you this example from a few days ago:

Me: *walks into room*  *sees cockroach on ground*
Brother: I can just squish it. It's just a roach.
Brother: *squishes it* You happy?
Brother: *shows it to me*
Brother: *flushes it down toilet* You done?
Me: Fine.

But I lived through it. I'm only squeamish about roaches. =P

The last day. *sobs* We packed up all of our stuff and left for the death plane, which I miraculously survived. Then another plane ride back to *coughs*, and I'm home!

Of course, that's not all.
I am leaving for Kentucky on a missions trip for a week, starting Saturday. I'm off to paint houses and run a vacation Bible school! I can't wait! So, I will see you guys in a few weeks! Maybe before, if you're lucky. ;)

~ Audrey